I drink, therefore I am

Personality tests reveal our psychological inner workings and are significantly cheaper than therapy. Answer these five questions to uncover what sort of drinker you really are.

1. You and a teenager spot a twenty dollar bill on the sidewalk. You...
Elbow the kid and get what's yours
Watch the kid cop the twenty and feel old
Pick up the twenty and donate it to charity

2. You've been dared to kiss the filthy toilet at a bar for $10,000, you think to yourself...
Hell yeah, I'd have done it for a twenty
Suck it up and pucker up
Begin calculating the total return on investment

3. During a staff meeting, you and Bob from accounting spot the last donut. You...
Get what's yours
Split the donut, taking the slightly larger half
Offer Bob the glazed jelly donut, who needs the trans fat

4. Today, the inscription in your high school yearbook would read...
Most likely to succeed in a game of flip cup
Most likely to update your Facebook at work
Most likely to donate to public radio

5. The scene at your favorite watering hole has the best...

Beer pong and two-for-one shots
Thursday night karaoke and a ridiculously hot bartender
Cheese plate and jazz quartet